11.12.2012

A VERY Rough Day

After having a breakdown in the student drop off line this morning at school I was about ready to just throw in the towel. I'm serious. Life just seems so relentless.

I took both Lucy and Jack to the doctor today. Jacks' asthma is out of control and Lucy has a nasty sinus infection. We narrowly escaped another trip to the ER with Jack. He was up all night last night, struggling to breath. So, lots of meds for both of them and we are praying for quick relief.


(On a side note, I've received a few emails from people who have treated their children for reflux and have had great results with their asthma improving. Anyone else ever heard of this?)

This is really not the week for extraneous health concerns. Not that there really ever is a great time, but this is "scan week" and probably the most stressful time in our lives. We are trusting in God to continue to bless Lucy with cancer free scans, but the wait is tortuous.  Throw in an asthma flare up and a nasty sinus infection and you have fun times at the Krull house.


As I said, this morning was bad. The past few weeks have been hard. We are, thankfully, winning the war on cancer but we seem to constantly be losing the little battles along the way. I have a pretty bad attitude right now and I'm really, really tired. Did in mention I'm tired? Not just physically tired, emotionally and mentally exhausted.  Someone said that its because the adrenaline wore off a few months ago.  Maybe they are right. I shouldn't have expected to keep up the pace of the past 18 months forever.


As I was rocking Jack--before he vomited everywhere then fell asleep in the tub (see picture above), and after he shattered my glass coffee table--I decide that making a (very abbreviated) thankful list might help my attitude. So, here goes:

1. I'm thankful for a cancer free Lucy.
2. I'm thankful that Ella is healthy and has a heart off gold.
3. I'm thankful for grandparents (especially my mom) who will drop everything to help me.
4. I'm thankful that Jack was unharmed when he shattered the glass table. Seriously, look at the picture. It could have been awful.


5. I'm thankful that my husband has a good job and that we have really good insurance.
6. I'm thankful for our doctors and nurse practitioners.
7. I'm thankful for this moment that I have to rock my baby to sleep.
8. I'm thankful for an amazing husband who went to work today, even though he felt like crap, so that he could provide for his family. He is the most amazing husband and father in the world.
9. I'm thankful for a loving God who would never turn His back on me even though I lashed out and screamed at Him today. My doubts and anger are no match for the awesome love to God.



45 comments:

  1. I have very bad acid reflux and am on medication for it. I do not have asthma but when I have heartburn or my reflux acts up it is a little harder for me to breathe. I would check into it.

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  2. I've been following your blog for a while, but I've never commented. Tonight needs a comment. I don't know what it must feel like for you to endure the day after day events, I honestly cannot imagine what that must be like, but please know that I think of you and pray for you and your precious family often. I know it might not sound like much, but I know that God hears when we cry out to Him. And He heard today when you cried out to Him. Take rest in that, my sister in Christ. I pray that He bring rest and restoration to your body and mind tonight. I pray that when you awaken tomorrow, that you feel refreshed and ready to tackle your day~whatever that may be. And as always, Lucy is in my prayers and thoughts, as well. You are a blessing and you are much loved by an Almighty God. Blessings to you tonight, my friend. Rest in Him.

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  3. You've got to be exhausted, running on fumes these days. Saying a prayer for you tonight for renewed energy and strength!

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  4. My 7 year old niece and 6 year old niece both have asthma but never took reflux medicine for it though, they usually had breathing treatments, inhalers, etc. for it though but my Mom also has asthma.


    Amy

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  5. Praying for energy, strength, patience and renewed vigor for you. This is tough!


    Praying and praying for relief from this asthma for Jack and clean scans for Lucy and for peace in Ella's heart. God bless that girl she too has gone through so much.

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  6. My husband has severe asthma, has since he was Jack's age. He started taking medication for acid reflux a few years back. The doctor explained that there IS a correlation. Since he began the reflux mediation his asthma has greatly improved. He is down to one inhaler a day and has only needed rescue inhaler a few times in a year. The reflux medication really helps with the breathing and to improve the asthma. He sees one of the best lung specialists in WI and there is good evidence to support the connection. I would seriously urge you to look into it for Jack.


    And, saying extra prayers for you tonight. Your mind, body, spirit all need rest. You have been caring for everyone for so long......and you need some care for YOU now. I know there is never time, but YOU are so in need and worth whatever time you can give to yourself to rest. Hugs.

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  7. I worked as a nurse for an asthma/allergy doctor. We had multiple little ones who had out of control asthma and once treated for reflux, symptoms greatly improved!! I would say its worth a try. :)

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  8. ((Hugs))--I'm always a city away and a phone call away if you need help with anything or everything! I'll do laundry, grocery shop, clean, etc. Even one day, one hour of time for you to just breathe-----walk or just blog! You squeeze all of your days! You are fearless-------wonderfully made!

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  9. Our son was diagnosed with asthma at 10 months. 8 months later some one told me about the reflux/asthma connection. We saw a GI doctor, got him on reflux medicine and he was a new kid. He didn't really have asthma. The reflux just irritated everything. All the vomiting from coughing and wheezing so hard did ruin his teeth and he ended up with dental surgery. Watch out for that! I hope that is your little guys problem. Praying hard for your family.

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  10. Hannah @Supermommy!...Or NotNovember 12, 2012 at 10:54 PM

    I used to have to visit the ER or hospital every few months for severe asthma attacks and then I started going to a new specialist who diagnosed me with Acid Reflux Disease and put me on meds for it. Since then, I only have to go the ER once every few years and the last few visits coincided with me forgetting to take my medicine. Definitely have Jack tested! The poor little guy needs some relief (and so do you!)

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  11. I am thankful that you are so candid with us. I am so sorry that you are feeling the weight of it all. I truly wish I could lift it off your shoulders and take a share of it for you. We all would, Kate. Truly. It isn't fair that you should have such a heavy load to bare. Take one day at a time. Try not to look forward or back. The Walk to Emmaus teaches us to have no expectations and just be... minute to minute. I pray that you are relieved of this burden that seems endless. You have endured more than most will ever have to endure. We have not stopped praying for you. Thinking back to when we thought Lucy would not make it a few months ago I have to stop and think if that expected outcome had played out. You would be wishing today for the day you have - albeit that it is hard and frustrating and you want to scream... but she is here. And anything can be endured as long as she is here.

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  12. Sounds like you've had an awful week...and I don't know you or the half of what you're going through, but I feel your pain through your post. I haven't heard about treating reflux to improve asthma symptoms, but I have just read about the wonders of Vitamin D3, a cheap and what seems like a great way to improve general health and wellbeing and may protect against a multitude of other conditions. Have a look at http://www.vitamindrevolution.com/ for some more information. I've just read the book and I find it intriguing, so much so I'm going to supplement our whole family this Autumn through Winter. Take care of yourself. :)

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  13. I am so sorry for all that you are going through. I will be praying that Jack and Lucy are feeling better soon! May God give you extra strength and grace and lots of rest this week!

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  14. Oh my heart is heavy as a Mother of a sick young adult child and pregnant, my heart is heavy for YOU. My Mom always told me since I was 9 and had a 2 month stay in Childrens Hospital for my kidneys consider yourself lucky throughout my bad days too, cause it only takes turning your head to see a Mother/family worse off than you. I lay here in the hospital tonight thanking God my daughter is in good hands and the baby is doing well at 32 weeks she just is ill and needs some tests done on her kidneys to sort out some issues. I know the exhaustion, but its ten fold for you. I pray for you and wish God to bless you with some stress free days/weeks ahead and please know im praying for you. Kate your a inspiration to many and your family is beautiful thank you for sharing and allowing us in your lives daily.

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  15. Beautifully stated. Amen!

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  16. Yes; reflux can definitely make asthma worse and since Jack has had so much Prednisone lately that would make reflux worse. It's a vicious cycle. Is he on any acid blockers? Call me at the office today when you get time and I sincerely hope you get some rest today. God's peace.

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  17. This is true but it doesn't take away the stress of your poor little baby struggling to breath with asthma or Lucy having a sinus infection and a Mom that is probably so tired, scared, nervous and stressed that she feels like she is at her wits end. I just wish I could be her neighbor for a week so I could be there to lift her load for 7 days so she could just sleep for 3-4 hours without waking. My heart is aching for the stress you are under. Kate, I am thinking of you and your family daily. Please give Ella a huge hug and tell her I am thinking of her today.

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  18. OH,Thank you for this, I do not know the Krull family personally, but I wish that I could have wrote the offer to her. This is exactly what I was hopng someone could offer her even if she didn't take you up on it, at least she knows that it is out there. You are sweet.

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  19. I am so very sorry you are going through all this junk! Praying especially for you, Kate, that you make sure to try, in some tiny way, to take care of yourself. I am worried about you, a woman I have never met, but who I care about deeply. Please take care.

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  20. Continued prayers! You need to try to find some help, with housework, grocery shopping, babysitting or something. Surely there is someone around who can help take the load off for a day or two each month. You need a total day of rest. And reflux is awful! I am so sorry you are dealing with that too. My daughter has allergy induced asthma, but as long as we are on all the meds, it stays away. Praying for relief from all you are going through!

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  21. Kate, I am praying for everyone to get well and for you to get some much needed rest. I am also praying for good scan results! You are an amazing mother! I read everyday and you inspire me to be a better mother and wife. Your children are SO blessed to have you as their mom and Erik is so blessed to have you as his number one lady! Hang in there and know that you are inspiring many!

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  22. Yes reflux can make asthma worse. My son has asthma and I was told that by a doctor.

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  23. After following you for so long and reading about Jack, I don't think it will hurt to see a Pulmonologist. My son battled his "asthma" for two years. We took every steroid ever invented, lived on breathing treatments, rushed to the ER numerous times, etc... Then, an angel gave me the name of a Pediatric Pulmonologist at UMC in Jackson. It took one trip for them to run a couple of tests, a prescription of Nexium, and he truly was a new child. No more projectile vomiting of gunk, no more sleepless nights of listening to him breathe, new child. I pray that you find Jack some relief, which will in turn bring you some relief, as well!

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  24. I have been following your family's journey via my niece's blog. When I read about your latest battle with asthma I wanted to pass along a number you can call and speak with a nurse. It is for National Jewish Health -rated the #1 respiratory Hospital -although located in Denver, they are here for anyone. Their Lung Line is 1-800-222-Lung (800-222-5864)

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  25. I am a PHysician Assistant in Allergy/asthma. I deal with these sweet kids all day! I'd be HAPPY to talk to you on the phone or email about what meds he's on, what to try, and talk to you about reflux. It definately can exacerbate asthma! My email is reneemclary@gmail.com. God Bless! Praying for y'all!

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  26. I found out recently that acid reflux will cause a situation that creates irritation of the esophagus which can cause conic coughing. I got rid of the coughing after i started prescr tagament. Hope that helps! Prayers are with you.

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  27. We lived through what you are going through with Jack when my son was young. We did two things. We put him on Grapeseed Extract which helps to build up their immune system and respitory system, I got him swimming a LOT to build up his lungs and we put him on acid reflux meds. It has taken a long time to find the right acid reflux meds but the grapeseed extract really really worked for us. He has had very very few asthma flare ups since he was 6 and and he just turned 12. We also have taken him to the chiropractor on a very regular basis. I highly recommend that. We have done that since he was about 2 years old. Sometimes she could pull him out of an asthma attack just by adjusting him. I am praying for you continuously.

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  28. ok, you HAVE TO take some of these offers for help. i'm a partial invalid, and if I tried to do everything myself, life would be unbearable. I cry for you, and i also have bronchial asthma/asthmatic bronchitis. It gets MUCH worse when I use any dairy products. Have you tried soy for jack? Whatever, the tired is sometimes the worst problem for the mom. Hopefully you are getting some rest before the big scan stuff. It is so hard to just rest in Him, i know, and hope all the posts are giving you courage and trust in a mighty, powerful God who can take care of each of His children. When we have trials, it is God saying, "come closer, my child". Prayers, hugs, and Blessings to you! Bev

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  29. You have more than enough on your plate my friend. I think you wouldn't be normal if you didn't feel like throwing in the towel with everything going on. Praying for you, and your sweet family! Praying for Lucy's scans to come back clean, and for some relief to hit you soon!!!

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  30. Hello, Kate!! So sorry for your rough start to the week. Praying things get better this week. My son does not have asthma issues but has always had ear infections. It seemed to get better when we got his reflux under control. It is all connected, so it would not hurt to try! Praying for better days! BTW, Lucy looks GREAT!!!!

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  31. My youngest son has allergy induced asthma, illness induced asthma (meaning respiratory infections trigger it), and reflux - which triggers his asthma as well. Once we got the reflux under control he stopped coughing all the time, and asthma became controlled better. He was not on meds for reflux as a baby, and at 4 years old he was on a fairly large dose. Today, at age 10, he's on adult dosage for OTC. We can tell when he's not had it. We've gotten him a hazelwood necklace and it has helped his reflux as well so he's not taking all of the doses of the OTC acid reflux meds. His asthma is "cough variant" instead of the normal. He coughs until he vomits in a full blown attack, and when sick with a cold or flu, he will wheeze while coughing.

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  32. Sounds like the reflux is something to check into. I wish I lived close enough to help you out! Might be a good idea to totally concentrate on your family and let all other "things" go for awhile. Another suggestion would be to take Jack off the bottle and have him use a cup. Maybe it would help if he wasn't having bottles of milk! Pray for you and your family daily.

    Grandma to many

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  33. does anyone have Kate's email address? If so, please provide. Thank you!

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  34. Kate, sending special prayers tonight for you. You are the heart of the home and you are tired, pushed to the limit, doubting your ability to carry on. Asking God to bless you with a spirit of peace, a good night of sleep and knowledge that many are praying for YOU today.

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  35. I believe you can click "contact me" at the top of the page for the e-mail.

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  36. So sorry to hear about Jack and Lucy. There is a connection between reflux and asthma. Have your allergist look into it. Sending prayers your way.

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  37. I cannot say it better than Jennifer Lloyd Goodwin!

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  38. Yes, my guys asthma almost subsided totally when his reflux was properly controlled.

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  39. I am a 58 year old asthmatic--didn't develop asthma until an adult--40ish. My pulmonary doc asked if I was having acid reflux--which I was. He stated that either asthma causes acid reflux or acid reflux causes asthma. Began Daily Nexium--big improvement! Worth a try! My dad had asthma as a child --he outgrew it so hang in there! Friend of Randy Rose---praying for you--God is in control. ERB

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  40. My daughter suffers from asthma pretty bad. We have her on a steroid (pulmicort) through a nebulizer machine once a day from November through May to help control her asthma. It especially helps when she is sick because she gets a nasty cough. Talk to Jack's pediatrician and see if there is some type of medicine to give to him until his asthma is controlled. Sorry things have been so rough. Praying for you and your family.

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  41. Praying big for All of you!!! I have had adult asthma for 3 years and I recently started taking Prilosec for SILENT reflux... I think it's helping. Dr oz had a program and my dr suggest I try its over the counter for adults!!! Praying for great scans for Lucy in Gruver Texas! God hold this family close and as only u can! In your name I pray!
    Marsha Lowe

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  42. Yes, I take prilosic on occasion and it's a miricle for asthma related coughing

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  43. My son had acid reflux induced asthma as Well. When he was in 2nd grade We decided it was time to have the acid reflux surgery. It was a rough recovery but totally worth it. It completely got rid of his acid reflux and asthma. He is in 8Th grade now and still acid and asthma free.

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  44. Late to the game, but my brother, who is 31, has been struggling with both asthma and reflux for most of his life and JUST found out they were connected, is on medication, and he's feeling so great. Hopefully your little man will be feeling better soon. Prayers for you and your family. xoxo

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