Ears and Determination

"Father fill my EARS with your beautiful love song and 

soothe my heart with your comforting words." Tracie Miles

When Lucy was really sick I was able to write often.  It was such a sweet respite from the numbness of the hospital room.  Now, when I have time to sit and write (which is virtually never,) it seems again like a respite from life.  It's a small distraction and one that I so appreciate.

Tomorrow Lucy goes in for her first ear surgery.  I want to be optimistic but I think It is more practical to be realistic.  Lucy hasn't had any functional hearing in her left ear for months.  I kept holding out hope that it would return but I don't think that's in the cards.  Especially now after the ridiculous ear infection that set in.  This morning we had another scare.  I went to wake her up for school and she didn't respond.  I could see her breathing so I knew that she was alive (not to be dramatic, but seriously.)  When I went over and woke her she couldn't hear me.  She couldn't hear anything.  Her right ear, her "good" ear, had no hearing.  I was scared and Lucy was very confused.  I can't imagine what was going through her mind.

But my goodness!  Have I mentioned how determined she is?  She insisted on going to school today, although we were about 2 hours late.  It was very challenging and huge kudos to her teacher for being willing to try to manage today.  Funny story: Lucy's teacher sent me a text around 1:00 to give me an update.  It said Bad News: Lucy's can't hear anything.  Good News: Doesn't seem to bother her a bit.  At one point the teacher was trying to teach and Lucy was sitting at her desk just a hummin' away.  She couldn't hear herself but the whole class sure could!

Listen, if I can't laugh at the situation I would cry myself silly.  Our life is quite comical at times.

Last week we went on a short little trip out West and had a quick family vacation before surgery.  We were very thankful the Dr. allowed us to travel so we made the most of our time away.  Lucy was registered to ski with the NSCD, the National Sports Center for the Disabled.  Last year she did the same but sat in a sit-ski which is an adaptive ski seat.  This year, however, Lucy was determined to ski.  We had not discussed this previously so I was more than shocked when this all came about.

I'll tell that story tomorrow (or the next day) because it's quite a doozy.  For now, I'll leave you with this precious bundle of POTENTIALITY.  100 bonus points to any Southern Baptist who knows what song I stole that word from.  The child that was determined to ski is my daily source of inspiration.  She reminds that me no mountain is too big and that I don't ever have to take "no" for an answer.  Lucy provides my daily lesson of courage and humility.

Tomorrow morning I will walk into the hospital worried, scared, anxious, doubtful and embarrassed at my lack of faith.  Lucy, on the other hand, will walk in ready to tackle the challenge ahead of her.  She won't look back but rather will run ahead to the finish line.  She will be brave and courageous and will leave everyone she greets in awe.  I love this kid.  She is the very best.