Tonight I am so thankful to be here. In my home with my family close by. Today we were able to all 5 make it to church. We stayed for Sunday School and "big" church! It was wonderful to be in the house of God today. Our choir was filled to the brim and I honestly thought that they would blow the roof off of the building as they sang today. Wow!! What a blessing. "Thou, O Lord"
Psalm 3:1-5
King James Version (KJV)
1Lord, how are they increased that trouble me! many are they that rise up against me.
2Many there be which say of my soul, There is no help for him in God. Selah.
3But thou, O LORD, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.
4I cried unto the LORD with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill. Selah.
5I laid me down and slept; I awaked; for the LORD sustained me.
Our pastor today challenged us to learn through life's difficulties. Clearly, this was one sermon that I could benefit from. As I listened to him speak, these words kept ringing in my ears "I am Committed to the Blessing of my Crisis." Everyday I realize a new blessing as we begin to lift our heads out of the murky waters. I look forward to watching His mercies unfold, as I wake each day and wait patiently for the blessings that will come from Lucy's illness.
Tomorrow morning we start a very busy week. Honestly, I am very thankful for a packed calendar. Friday is Lucy's scan day and I when I allow myself to stop and think about it I start getting sick. So, I am going to keep myself really busy this week. And when they doesn't work, I'll just spend a lot of time praying! Lucy begins her work with her new tutor in the morning. I am happy to have found Cissy and I know she is going to be the perfect fit. Thank you to ALL the many people who emailed me, texted me or messaged me about this situation. I honestly did what I said I was going to do. Which was nothing. When Cissy called, it just felt right. I am so humbled that so many of you were willing to help.
After tutoring we head to St. Jude for a weight check and electrolyte check. The rest of the week will consist of school, PT, OT, church, dentist visit for both girls, tumbling and most importantly.....a visit from Erik's parents. The girls are already counting down the days!
Love your pictures since I took some of the same pictures last February '11 when my parent's, my brother, sister-in-law, niece, nephew and sister all went there at the end of February to early March.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Amy
Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength. They will mount up with wings like eagles. they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary. Isaiah 40:31
ReplyDeletePraying for renewed strength for you all this week
I'm so thankful that you all are home and that you got to attend church together. That is wonderful. I will be praying specifically about the scan on Friday. It will be great, I have full faith. God Bless you all!
ReplyDeleteOh, so glad you are feeling good in your head and heart. And I LOVE the picture of your three cuties at Disney. Will be praying for a good week for all of you.
ReplyDeleteKate, my Bible Study leader, Jean Stockdale, wrote a post about these verses. It ministered to me just when I needed it. Praying the same for you. See below.... - Amy Sullivan
ReplyDeletePsalm 3:3-4 But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head. I cried aloud to the Lord,and he answered me from his holy hill. Selah.
I love the phrase "lifter of my head." This indicates that the Lord recognizes that life is hard and that at times we will feel defeated and discouraged. As I have faith walked (on wobbly legs at times) through this recent season of suffering, I have discovered that I am easily disappointed in myself when I have "a melt down" and feel "fit to quit" over the current crisis at hand. Some days have been too painful to endure (humanly speaking) and I have just "taken to my bed"-unable to take anymore. And I have been so mad at myself. I know better. I know TRUTH. Yet, in some moments (and yes, even some days) I had trouble accessing and activating what I knew TO BE TRUE. Anybody?
As believers we want to handle every crisis with grace and spiritual maturity. We want to honor the Lord. We want to show a fallen world how a child of God handles suffering and the accompanying stress-without falling apart at the seams. But frankly, I have discovered this life will not always tolerate such. Suffering comes. And sometimes it comes in wave upon wave until you think you are about to drown in the drama of it. Anybody? And it brings sorrow, stress, tears, and - in unexpected moments - tantrums. But do you know what I have freshly learned? In my worst moments, when I caved into the gravity of the crisis, when I have cried and pouted, when I have wondered what in the world was God up to and why didn't He fix this, when I have struggled to breath because of the suffocating weight of the pain, when I have been certain I could not bear up under another day, then I have met God in a fresh way. Not as a disappointed father, wagging His finger of judgement at me, scolding and chastising me for my childish response, but I have seen Him as a loving DADDY who comes with arms wide open to catch me up in His warm embrace. He is the LIFTER OF MY HEAD. I have discovered that the show of emotions that have disappointed me in my response, have not disappointed or disturbed my Father. The painful emotional melt-downs, although ugly to observe and painful to admit, are not evidence of my lack of faith. Rather they are confirmation of my humanity. Patiently my Father has LIFTED MY HEAD and let me CRY ALOUD TO HIM. He has consoled His troubled child and reassured me of His lovingkindness, mercy and grace. He has captured my tears in a bottle. (I can only assume that together in glory He and I will pour them out as an offering of praise for what Christ and the cross did to ultimately end all suffering, all crying, all sorrow, and made a way of escape for our sin! Excuse me while I do the dance of joy!) His peace and His presence have flooded my soul. His tolerance of my humanness has given me time to regain my spiritual equilibrium. He restored the joy of Jesus as I stood in the midst of unthinkable suffering. And possibly best of all - He has SHIElDED me from my own INTOLERANCE!
Psalm 3:3-4 But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head. I cried aloud to the Lord,and he answered me from his holy hill.
Selah. Think about THAT for a while!!
Glad to hear that you came to a decision concerning school work. Praying and praying for these scans to be clear and for Lucy's weight to climb.
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a great visit with the grandparents. :)
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Kate, praying your week is full of peace knowing that your sisters in Christ are praying for good reports on Lucy.
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Love the family pictures :)
ReplyDeleteKate,
ReplyDeleteI am sorry that your day on Monday was not as good as Sunday. It makes me sad for you and for your entire family.
I don't even begin to imagine the struggles that you are going through except to say that we are praying for you all without ceasing.
If we lived closer, I would immediately become friends, I am ending my child rearing stages and you are at the beginning of it. You are a great mom and this is a great place to vent. We all are praying and listening and if you don't tell us how you feel, we don't know specifically how to pray.
Thank you so much for your honesty and transparency.
Praying without ceasing!
paulaschaffin@gmail.com